A Man’s War for Sexual Purity, Part III

Sexual purity demands that a man engage his heart, mind, and body in the battle. In part one, we looked at the heart and part two, the mind. In this article we will more fully consider the area of the body or flesh. There is no doubt that men are wired with an acute sensitivity to this realm. What we see and touch, or are touched by, triggers a rush that is comparable to a locomotive at top speed. If a man only fights his war on this battlefield, he will either experience great shame and condemnation from defeat or he will be frustrated by the relentless nature of temptation when legalisms he imposes upon himself do not fully relieve or satisfy the temptation. The heart and the mind are essential battles that must be engaged prior to and along with the battle in the body. While none of these battles are completely separate from one another, the man will never experience victory in the battle for the body if a priority is not given to the heart and the mind.

Three specific weapons are to be used in the body to fight for sexual purity. First Corinthians 9:27 teaches that there is a purpose for exercising discipline in the body, to accomplish a greater goal, live for a higher purpose, and not be disqualified. Men, we must exercise discipline in our lives in order to live for the higher purpose of God’s glory. The glory of God is the supreme priority of our lives. As Christian men we live on mission for God, to share the gospel, and make disciples. We should allow nothing to master our lives but to live for the full reward of God’s glory. Disciplines are the practical expression in the body of what consumes our heart and mind. They align our actions in the flesh with our knowledge of God’s truth and motivations of his glory. We willingly give up immediate pleasure for God’s eternal glory.

When we indulge in practices that feed our urges and temptations, we only weaken the motivations of our heart for God and believe the lies of the evil one instead of God’s truth. Love for God and knowledge of God is to be fully expressed in the body by the way we live every day. Build godly disciplines into your life to feed and guard your heart, mind, and body. Understand where and when temptations most attack you and flee from the things that create them as much as you can. Stand courageously against temptations, trusting God’s faithful provision for your purity.

A second essential weapon for sexual purity is not just to oppose attacks, but to practice a healthy sexual relationship in marriage. Your wife is your greatest guardian for purity in the body. Entrust yourself to her. Communicate to her your needs and temptations, so she can pray and provide for you in order to guard you. Consume your heart, mind, and body with her, so there will be no desire or room for another woman or image. Work to build a strong marriage relationship in every way, so she can be the one woman that makes you a pure man. A strong marital relationship is critical in winning the war for sexual purity. Many men believe the lie that sexual temptation will disappear when they get married, only to realize the battle will intensify if the marriage relationship is not strategically utilized to engage the battle. Your wife should become your standard of beauty in which you fully delight (Pro. 5:18-19). She should be your constant meditation of gratitude unto God in the midst of temptation. She alone must be your guard as you fully entrust yourself sexually to her. May she consume your every sense so that when temptation comes it only reminds you of her all-consuming beauty.

A single man that struggles with sexual temptation and sin must engage the battle without this immediate guard in the body. If passion and desires consume him, he should entrust himself to wise counsel and do the hard work of pursuing, winning, and marrying a woman. Learning to live in purity is not an unreal goal. It is a vision for godliness that every man must discipline himself and train for.

Community among godly men for encouragement and accountability serves as another great weapon in the battle. Men, married and single, should encourage one another in the war for purity. Bravery, strength, and courage multiplies and spreads among men who are focused and surrendered to a common mission. Men who live with pretense around other men only serve to make cowards out of other men. Men, fight the temptation to hide in your struggle. This will only weaken you in battle. When your battle causes you to cower in this way, it is no solace to have other men cower with you. Invite them into the battle by speaking honestly and openly, wisely and authentically, truthfully and humbly.

May God bless us and use us as we trust Jesus’ redeeming work within us.