A Time to Embrace

by Heather Myer
Louise and Kyla formed a friendship that grew beyond age barriers. Louise was a kind 90 year old lady who enjoyed working on word search puzzles while volunteering at a local community organization. Kyla, a 23-year-old employee helped her find tricky backwards and diagonal words. Their friendship formed over a year of joint work on puzzles and conversations about life. One day, Louise had a stroke. Kyla continued their friendship by visiting Louise in the care facility for 1–2 hours a day. Louise was not lucid. Her voice slurred, and she was confused. She was not alert to person, place, time, or date. Unsure whether Louise’s condition would decline or improve, Kyla pulled up a chair beside the elderly lady, whom she loved. She took the small, aged hand between her own strong hands. Her slender fingers stroked those crippled from arthritis and pain. Laughing, Kyla told Louise about her day, the news, work, her wedding plans, and her pug dogs. Still holding hands, they watched cartoons and sitcoms, as Kyla laughed and encouraged Louise.

Scientific studies have proven that hand holding has very specific health benefits. Heart rates slow. Blood pressure lowers. Respirations are fewer. Endorphins, hormones that allow for good feelings, are released. Stress levels are lowered. Tension in the temples and between eyebrows vanishes. Shoulders, weighed by life’s burdens, are lifted. In the simple act of grasping Louise’s hand as they sat together, Kyla administered a treatment that modern medicine could not: time, reassurance, familiarity, and love.

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, and a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace. —Eccles. 3:1–8